BYU NEWSNET–“12 Former LDS Missionaries Posing for Controversial Calendar” *

A calendar of former LDS missionaries caused controversy among LDS and non-LDS people.

Mormons Exposed, a Las Vegas-based company, launched a controversial calendar showing pictures of 12 bare-chested former LDS missionaries.

Chad Hardy, co-founder of Mormons Exposed and a former BYU student, said he came up with this idea because he was tired of the stereotypes that people out of the church have about the LDS people.

You mean that stereotype that we’re all FREAKS?  Yeah, I’m so glad that myth is finally being dispelled.

(*Hat tip:  Mormon Mommy Wars.  In other words, I do NOT regularly read BYU Newsnet.)

Sugar Daddy’s Pillow Talk:  Is God a math geek?

Sugar Daddy:  If I were God, could I make people with twelve fingers and still be creating them in my own image?

Madhousewife:  What…?

SD:  It would just be a lot more convenient.

Mad:  How so?

SD:  Because then you’d have your number system as base twelve instead of base ten.  A lot more convenient.

Mad:  I don’t understand.

SD:  Because twelve can be halved, thirded, and quartered, without using decimals.  A lot more convenient.

Mad:  Okay.

SD: (Falls asleep counting sheep in base 12)

Mad:  (Up all night)*

*Dramatic license:  Actually, it was my Restless Leg Syndrome that kept me up all night.  But it’s funnier to think that I was up all night contemplating my husband’s madness.

Mister Bubby:  “Ev’ry Time I Feel the Spirit”

So we had our Primary Program at church yesterday.  For you NoMos, this is the annual event where all the kids aged three to twelve run the chapel service.  Okay, so they have direction from some grown-ups, but they are the “performers.”  (I guess we’re not supposed to call it “performing” in church, but I don’t know the religious word for “get up and sing songs and say the lines you’ve rehearsed.”)  Anyway, it is not uncommon for parents to get a little teary-eyed whilst watching their sweet children sing praises unto the Most High (not universal, but not uncommon–we Mormons are an emotional bunch).  I myself was moved to tears yesterday when Mister Bubby, singing a rousing chorus of “I will go, I will do/The things the Lord commands!”, started bringing on the funk with some improvised dance moves.  I might not have cried had I not been working so hard to stifle my laughter.*  I suppose I shouldn’t encourage him.  Except that I think I want to.

*This was even funnier than the year five-year-old Princess Zurg ran down the aisles screaming, “I have to leave this place!”  Primary Program = Good Times.