Vanity plates addendum

So yesterday on the way to church I saw a car with a license plate that read, “IH8MY X.”  I thought, “Wow, that person really does hate their ex, if they’re willing to pay the vanity plate fee every two years just to tell the world how much they hate their ex.”  Then I thought, what kind of person enjoys carrying around hate like that?  I assume it must give them some perverse pleasure, every time they get in their car, to think about how they’re dissing their ex all over town.  Except that the ex probably doesn’t give a crap.  It’s not like they’re mentioned by name.  Does this person drive by their ex’s house every day, go to their ex’s place of business and park in their parking space?  How exactly are they sticking it to their ex by having this license plate?  It would seem to me that they’re sticking it to themselves.

Which makes me wonder, who wants to get involved with a person who’s a) that hung up on their ex and b) so foolish with their money to buy a vanity plate that advertises that they’re hung up on their ex?  Not to mention the bitterness.  Why would you want to present this face to the world?  My advice to anyone considering this:  if you’re that upset, get a bumper sticker.  You only have to pay for it once.  But if you really want to spend money talking about your ex, get therapy.  Seriously.  Get therapy.

Does your mother still dress you?

The other day Princess Zurg told me she saw a boy wearing a t-shirt that said, “The Good:  Video games.  The Bad:  Homework.  The Ugly:  My sister.”  I tried to explain the Clint Eastwood reference to her, but then I realized she didn’t give a crap about that.  (I seem to be using the phrase “give a crap” a lot today, which is funny as in strange, because it is not a phrase I use with any regularity in real life.  I usually say “give a @#*(.”  Just kidding.  Actually, I usually say, “Give a hoot, don’t pollute.”  I appear to be going off on a tangent here.  Does anyone give a crap?)  No, she was just upset that someone would wear such a mean shirt.

We’ve had this discussion before.  She knows I don’t like “mean” t-shirts either, especially ones made for children.  It just makes me wonder, what kind of parent lets their son wear a shirt that calls his sister ugly?  A parent whose son doesn’t have a sister, maybe?  So what’s funny about calling your non-existent sister ugly?  I don’t get it.  I assume that if this kid is wearing a “My sister is ugly” shirt, he probably has a sister, and she probably doesn’t appreciate being called ugly, even on a t-shirt.  (Hey, at least it’s not a license plate.)  So seriously, who thinks this shirt is a) funny and/or b) not something a jerk would wear?

PZ told me that she also saw a shirt that said, “Blame My Parents.”  I’m not any fonder of that one.  In my experience, no one needs a t-shirt to tell them whom to blame.  The judgment just seems to come naturally.

Speaking of judgment and what comes naturally

Ralph Nader has announced he’s running for President.  Of the United States.  Again.  He said he’s running because the mainstream candidates are too closely tied to corporate America.  (Shocking, I know.)  I have only one thing to say.

Dude.  Aren’t you getting a little old for this?

Actually, I can only second Barack Obama, who responded to the Nader announcement thusly:  “He thought that there was no difference between Al Gore and George Bush, and eight years later I think people realize that Ralph did not know what he was talking about.”

I like trash-talking Barack.  We need more of that guy, less of all this hope and change crap.

Post-Oscars joke of the day

What has two thumbs and doesn’t give a crap about the Oscars?

This girl!