I had a dream last night that I was cleaning out my garage with the husband, and by the time we were finished, the whole garage had been rid of superfluous crap, except for one box that fit neatly under a shelf.  Only two problems:

1)  It was my parents’ garage, not mine.

2)  It was only a dream, so all this superfluous crap is still in my garage, despite the fact that I worked SO HARD in my dream that I woke up exhausted.

Bad motor skill news:

Every time I throw a frisbee, I prove that I am an uncoordinated dork.  Even my children lose patience with me.  I’m talking about the 5- and 2-year-old.  The only reason it upsets me–well, not the only reason, but the primary reason–is that I used to be able to throw a frisbee just fine.  Because, you know, frisbee-throwing is just not that hard.  And don’t try to make me feel better by saying you can’t throw a frisbee either.  That won’t make me feel better.

Good motor skill news:

I successfully executed a pull-back (single) in my tap class last night, not once, not twice, but three times.  Three times out of 47 is pretty darn good…for me.  Never mind the fact that all of my successful pull-backs have been accidental.  That is neither here nor there.  I was talking to my fellow tappers about the Accidental Pull-back, and one of them said it sounded like the name of a book.  Well, it actually sounds like a take-off of The Accidental Tourist, but that’s neither here nor there.  The point is that I thought she had a good idea, and if I was the creative type I could write a series of mysteries about a mild-mannered housewife who was tap-dancer by day/crime-solver by night.  Or, actually, I guess it would be the other way around.  The Case of the Accidental Pull-backThe Case of the Sham Shim-Sham ShimmyThe Case of the…well, I’m sure if I was that lady who writes the cat books, I could come up with another title.  I guess I’m not cut out to be a best-selling author after all.

I’m going to take another hit of orange-flavored fish-oil pudding.  Down the hatch, kids.

Yeah, that’s some good stuff.


The other day Sugar Daddy took Elvis to a freshman football game at the local high school.  Since then, Elvis has been wanting to play with the football.  His dad is better at playing with the football than I am.  I thought I could throw a football well enough for a 5-year-old, creeping frisbee disability notwithstanding, but apparently not, since Elvis just gave up on me after a few minutes.  Anyway, the other other day SD was talking about how complicated a game football is, and I said, “I’ve always said football is a complicated game, and people always laughed at me and said it wasn’t complicated, you just moved the ball from one end of the field to the other.”  And he asked if these mockers of mine were chicks, and I said, no, they were men.  And he said, “Well, those men were stupid.”

Ever have one of those days where you feel like you didn’t take a shower, even though you did?  I’m having one of those days.  Maybe if I combed my hair, I’d feel better.  I’m going to go comb my hair now.