Elvis spills a drink on the floor: “Oh! It spilled! Where’s the housekeepers? [cleaning up] Housekeepers went home.”

Elvis’s diagnosis of the cat lying flattened on the road:  “It broke.”

Elvis’s mantra in the face of canine companionship:  “The dog will not eat you.”

.

Girlfriend, playing with her toy horses, sings, “You can’t take me–I’m free!”

.

Elvis at 7:00 a.m.:  “THE GARBAGE TRUCK’S NOT HERE!  IT’S MISSING!  I CAN’T FIND IT!  I’M SAD!”

Elvis at 7:30 a.m.:  “GARBAGE TRUCK CAME!  I SAW IT!  I SAW THEM ALL!  I SAY THANK YOU, TRASH!”

.

So the kids are all back in school, except for Girlfriend, who starts pre-school next Monday.  Monday through Thursday, 12:30-3:00 p.m., I will be absolutely KID-FREE.  I know what you’re thinking.  “Yay for you!  How awesome is that?”  Answer:  pretty awesome.  There’s only one drawback, of course, and that’s that with ten whole hours of kid-free time per week, my husband is going to expect me to get a lot more accomplished around here.  I think I’m going to expect me to get a lot more accomplished around here.  No more excuses for not doing the shopping, for example.  And what about the house looking like hell?  It will probably have to stop doing that.

In about forty minutes I have to take Girlfriend to her pre-school open house so we can meet her teacher and junk.  I should probably brush her hair before we go, just so I can say I tried.

Another thing I need to do today is pick up the family portraits we had taken at the JC Penneys a couple weeks ago.  They’ve been ready since September 3, but I forgot all about their existence.  They’re all the way down at the freaking mall.  That’s totally out of my way.  But what can I do?  The mall won’t come to me.  And why not?  What’s wrong with me?  Am I not worth the effort?  I bet it’s just some bureaucratic rule.  I hate that crap.

Can you tell that I’m just making a to-do list now, instead of writing an actual post?  Is it that obvious?  I just want to make sure I remember to do all the stuff I’m supposed to be doing.  I was going to say that with the kids back in school and me with ten kid-free hours a week, you might expect to see me blogging more often.  MORE EXPECTATIONS!  Look, I’m not Superwoman.  I’ll do what I can, but the blogging-material pickins were slim before; I don’t anticipate them getting thicker just because I’m flush with free time all of a sudden.  Not that I can’t stretch the thin gruel even thinner when I’m properly motivated, but I don’t want you to get your hopes up one way or the other.  That’s all.

I wish I had a joke to close with, but the fact is, I just have a head of tangled hair to brush.  Ciao, babies.

Advertisements