There’s nothing particularly awesome about this Wednesday, but I was hoping that if I feigned enthusiasm, it might make the day a little brighter for all of us. I suppose it might have been more effective if I hadn’t revealed the “feigning” part, but it’s too late now. Let’s just get on with our Wednesday! I’m super-excited, aren’t you?!

So what do I have going on today? Girlfriend is going back to pre-school. After her puking session yesterday, she seemed to have a spontaneous recovery. Isn’t it funny how sometimes all you need to do is throw up, and bammo, you’re cured? Has that not ever happened to you? It’s happened to me. Kind of makes you wish you’d thrown up earlier, doesn’t it? Well, better late than never, that’s what I always say.

While GF is at school, I need to go get some blood drawn. My psychiatrist ordered some tests to check my iron and my hormone levels and crap, to see if it’s my ovaries, stupid. I don’t mind getting blood drawn. I don’t fear the needle, man. I’m hardcore. I just don’t like that I have to fast for twelve hours beforehand. Mind you, I’ve fasted for twelve hours before, lots of times. Easily. But those times were all on accident. Fasting for twelve hours on purpose is a real chore. Suddenly there is nothing to do but eat!  Talking of which, I want to eat right now!  But I can’t.  Not until the blood is drawn.  I must change the subject.

I burned dinner last night.  That hasn’t happened in a while.  I don’t think it was my ovaries that made me do it, but it might have been.  I like to think that I’m just absent-minded.  Like a professor.  That means I’m smart, even though I burned dinner.  Right?

Let’s see, what else can I tell you?  I have tap class again tonight.  We’ve been working on pull-backs, which I’ve told you before are wicked-hard.  I have to master pull-backs before I can achieve the next level of tap-dancing glory.  I don’t know if that day will ever come, but I want you all to know that I have mastered the double pull-back.  Mastered it!  Or at least journeyman-ed it.  The double is easier than the single, naturally, which accounts for my competence.  The single is still an extreme challenge.  I nail it about half the time, and then only off the heel, never off the toes.  The idea of ever doing it off the toes is just crazy to me.  I think I might learn to drive a stick shift first.  Or fly.

Speaking of flying, I need a segue to my next subject, which has nothing to do with flying.  Girlfriend’s birthday is this month, and she is having her first-ever real birthday party, complete with friends (the kind not related to her).  We filled out the invitations yesterday.  She was very pleased with them.  She was significantly less pleased when I told her we needed to deliver them to her friends at school today.  She insisted that we were to save them for the party.  I tried to explain to her that we couldn’t really have a party if we didn’t invite people to it, but she was pretty irrational-female about it, so eventually I just dropped the subject.  Of course, we’ll have to deal with it again in a few hours, when it’s time to go to school and deliver her invitations, but that will be then.  This is now.

Did I mention that we’re inviting, fourteen children to this party?  Sugar Daddy’s original plan was to have it the Saturday after Thanksgiving, but I thought that since so many people go out of town for Thanksgiving weekend, that probably wouldn’t bode so well for the attendance factor.  So we scheduled it for the Saturday before Thanksgiving instead.  In retrospect I’m thinking that maximizing attendance wasn’t the detail to focus on.  But it’s been a long time since I’ve thrown a party for a five-year-old.  I was thinking about her happiness, rather than my sanity.  Doesn’t that make me a good mother?  Or just a stupid one?  That’s rhetorical, by the way.  You don’t need to respond.

Well, I need to take a shower today.  Since I can’t eat or anything.  Gotta do something!  If you’re just dying to read more of me, I have a post at By Common Consent today.  If you’ve had your fill, just tune in again tomorrow, same bat-time, same bat-channel.  I suppose I might make that “same giraffe-time, same giraffe-channel,” but would any of you get that, or would you just think I’d lost my mind?  Here’s a better question:  Do any of you get the bat-time/bat-channel thing, or do you think I’ve just lost my mind?  Should I just take my shower now?  I think I’ll do that.

Enjoy your Wednesday, mateys!