Of course, that’s pretty much what I do every day. Perhaps to make today special, I should blog about whatever YOU want. But you’re not here in my private editor telling me what you want me to blog about, so I’m afraid I’m going to have to go with my original plan.
Did anyone else read “my private editor” and immediately think “My Private Idaho”? No?
I’m livin’ in my own private editor…
Like I said, it’s my birthday. I’m forty-one. FORTY-ONE AND STILL HERE. So far the birthday festivities have included a shower (woo-hoo!), a bowl of my favorite breakfast cereal which happened to be on sale yesterday (COINCIDENCE?), an hour and a half playing puppies with Girlfriend before kindergarten, lunch at the Indian buffet with Sugar Daddy, who then took me to the DSW and bought me three pairs of shoes, and…well, I also have this t-shirt with a picture of a couple octopi in a takoyaki food cart with the caption, “It’s not a Taco. It’s a Tako!” I was going to take a picture of it for you, but I just realized that I have no idea how to access the webcam on this new laptop. Which I guess is an improvement on my old laptop, which had the webcam accidentally accessible at all times. (I am too lazy to take a picture with the digital camera and upload/download it. It’s my birthday and I shouldn’t have to work that hard.) Anyway, SD bought it for me for sentimental reasons–in memory of our trip to Japan, where we ate takoyaki. Also, he wanted me to have a shirt that said “Octopus Balls” on it.
I wish I had taken a picture of me at the DSW trying on these pink glitter platform shoes. I don’t buy a lot of shoes because I’m too practical. The three pairs of shoes I bought today, that’s not my usual thing. One pair was for necessity, one pair was practical, and the third pair was arguably frivolous but also on clearance. I almost wanted to buy those pink glitter platform shoes just on principle–the principle of awesome–but I wasn’t feeling that frivolous (despite the fact they were also on clearance). I understand why women wear those shoes, despite the fact that they’re extraordinarily uncomfortable and you feel like you’re going to tip over any second. It’s like being on stilts–you get an entirely new perspective on the world. LIKE YOU’RE THE SUPREME RULER OF EVERYONE ELSE. Also, your feet look tiny because they’re in the Barbie position.
But no, I just bought some very practical, comfortable and attractive shoes. I forgot where I was going with that last paragraph. I said I don’t buy a lot of shoes because I’m too practical, but I love shoes. If I bought every pair of shoes I wanted, I’d have about a thousand pair of shoes by now, and that’s about 980 too many. I’m not sure how many shoes I have right now. A couple of them are missing, unfortunately. But now is not the time for sad stories.
Speaking of sad stories, I’m going to save my Donna Summer Tribute Post for tomorrow. Not to make everything about me (even though it is), but a birthday just doesn’t seem an appropriate occasion for a wake, even a Disco Wake.
My son is complaining about where I want to go for dinner tonight. Can you believe the nerve of him?
Here are some things I need to do in the next hour and a half: help Elvis with his homework, take Elvis and Girlfriend to the library, do a load of laundry. That’s, like, nothing. But I should get started on it, or I won’t succeed, and to fail at doing nothing on your 41st natal anniversary is just depressing. Happy My Birthday, gentle readers!