After bath time, a little music

Madhousewife: Girlfriend, are you playing guitar naked?

Girlfriend: That’s what a doggy would do.

Mad: Dogs play the guitar naked?

GF: Doggies don’t wear clothes.

Mad: That’s true.

GF: But they might put on a hat. Or a sweater.


The Madhousehold plays Capture the Flag

Mister Bubby: Which team am I on?

Sugar Daddy: The blue team, because you’re not wearing a black shirt.

MB: But that’s not fair because it will be three against one.

Mad: I like how I don’t count for anything here.

MB: Mom is useless!

Mad: I know that! I’m just saying.


The Madhousehold reads from the Gospel of Luke, Chapter 23

Princess Zurg: “And Pilate, when he had called together the chief priests and the rulers and the people, said unto them, Ye have brought this man unto me, as one that perverteth the people–”

[Audible snickering]

PZ: “–and, behold, I, having examined him before you, have found no fault in this man touching those things whereof ye accuse him.” Dad, you’re so immature.


While we’re on the topic of religion, Madhousewife teaches 8-year-old Sunday School

Madhousewife: All right, chumps, settle down.

Eight-year-old #1: What did you call us?

Madhousewife: Chumps.

Eight-year-old #2: I don’t think you should call us that.

Madhousewife: Shows what you know, chump.



Most valuable player

Sugar Daddy: Elvis, who do you love?

Elvis: Um…Mommy, Daddy…Girlfriend…Mister Bubby…Princess Zurg…Chris Paul.


Meal planning with Madhousewife and Girlfriend

Mad: Are you hungry, Girlfriend?

GF: Yes.

Mad: We can’t get hamburgers because I think Daddy’s grilling hamburgers for dinner tonight. Do you like anything at Taco Bell?

GF: No.

Mad: Fair enough. Well…there’s a McDonald’s on the way home.

GF: McDonald’s! Yay!

Mad: But you can’t get a hamburger because we’re having hamburgers for dinner.

GF: Can I get a cheeseburger?